i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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