Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
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