god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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