I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
