we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
