Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
They have beer where we have blood.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize