I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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