You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
