I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
