i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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