You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
