She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
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