your room smells of hookers.
And success
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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