I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.