..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
