theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
