i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
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