Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
