It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
