is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
