i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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