i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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