Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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