Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I don't think brook has ever known best
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
