You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
