there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
