I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
This baby is an asshole
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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