ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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