Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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