but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I have already put on my inside pants.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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