I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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