Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
