is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Randomize