That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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