Texts From Last Night

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  (133): View more from

  YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby

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  (133): YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby http://tfl.nu/m0vf
  Replies (6) Good night (1582) Bad night (484)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!

  (804): View more from Virginia

  a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.

  (804): View more from Virginia

  That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.

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  (540): i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater! (804): a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf. (804): That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit. http://tfl.nu/wspf
  Replies (115) Good night (981) Bad night (3320)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh

  (513): View more from Ohio

  is this your pickup line?

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  (304): my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh (513): is this your pickup line? http://tfl.nu/r4ba
  Replies (20) Good night (948) Bad night (5417)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins

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  (517): You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins http://tfl.nu/vpk9
  Replies (19) Good night (5930) Bad night (953)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Why are you covered in frosting?

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.

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  (952): Why are you covered in frosting? (262): Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy. http://tfl.nu/9hct
  Replies (24) Good night (6474) Bad night (1068)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.

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  (603): I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months. http://tfl.nu/isje
  Replies (9) Good night (3786) Bad night (1460)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?

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  (360): Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life? http://tfl.nu/1n7v
  Replies (14) Good night (4058) Bad night (848)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out

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  (540): You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out http://tfl.nu/n0iw
  Replies (9) Good night (986) Bad night (3567)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  its not a party unless mikie exposes himself

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  (419): its not a party unless mikie exposes himself http://tfl.nu/ozsv
  Replies (5) Good night (2098) Bad night (759)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.

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  (360): I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though. http://tfl.nu/86o1
  Replies (20) Good night (767) Bad night (1917)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.

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  (509): first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off. http://tfl.nu/heya
  Replies (7) Good night (553) Bad night (1411)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.

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  (360): Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit. http://tfl.nu/9fav
  Replies (4) Good night (568) Bad night (947)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?

  (540): View more from Virginia

  One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...

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  (757): Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something? (540): One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend... http://tfl.nu/ltk8
  Replies (0) Good night (807) Bad night (372)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later

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  (919): That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later http://tfl.nu/qro9
  Replies (3) Good night (768) Bad night (286)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening

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  (508): I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening http://tfl.nu/7pf2
  Replies (1) Good night (214) Bad night (81)

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