Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...

  (703): View more from Virginia

  oh

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  (248): So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine... (703): oh http://tfl.nu/2rig
  Replies (10) Good night (940) Bad night (3266)
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  (650): View more from California

  like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.

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  (650): like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it. http://tfl.nu/vsdn
  Replies (13) Good night (996) Bad night (1995)
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.

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  (905): Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee. http://tfl.nu/8vei
  Replies (13) Good night (1041) Bad night (3770)
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  (650): View more from California

  Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss

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  (650): Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss http://tfl.nu/9lml
  Replies (40) Good night (5905) Bad night (1630)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.

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  (203): I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further. http://tfl.nu/4sxq
  Replies (5) Good night (2596) Bad night (843)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".

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  (302): He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice". http://tfl.nu/55zb
  Replies (23) Good night (5220) Bad night (1773)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.

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  (613): Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control. http://tfl.nu/w1lp
  Replies (4) Good night (2010) Bad night (475)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.

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  (541): If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him. http://tfl.nu/336d
  Replies (9) Good night (733) Bad night (838)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.

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  (720): I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped. http://tfl.nu/6z5g
  Replies (4) Good night (380) Bad night (815)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.

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  (425): I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep. http://tfl.nu/3psv
  Replies (0) Good night (468) Bad night (386)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.

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  (215): Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self. http://tfl.nu/eubl
  Replies (0) Good night (653) Bad night (325)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier

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  (207): i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier http://tfl.nu/yoel
  Replies (4) Good night (794) Bad night (341)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...

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  (908): There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere... http://tfl.nu/vrgz
  Replies (3) Good night (476) Bad night (258)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.

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  (212): She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her. http://tfl.nu/eh3i
  Replies (4) Good night (1357) Bad night (318)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.

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  (630): You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional. http://tfl.nu/yewn
  Replies (2) Good night (650) Bad night (391)

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