She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
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