can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize