The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
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Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
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I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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