I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
