We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
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