But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
