maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
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My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
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Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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