Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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