your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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