THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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