I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Randomize
