My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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