how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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