So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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