He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
